Answered Prayer

Last night at the end of our Wednesday night college community group, my prayer wasn't many words but it was so what I meant and what I needed.

"Father, I just want to see You... nothing else I could pray for right now compares to that."

It had nothing to do with any one else's prayer or anyone other than the Lord and me. We started a new book called Tangible Kingdom Primer this past week and Tuesday night I poured my heart out to God.. The questions in the book didn't exactly match up with what came from my heart but that doesn't really matter.

I desperately wanted nothing more than to fall madly in love with Jesus again.. with the creator of the universe.. with the creator of me.. the one who breathed the stars into existence and calls every single one by name.. the Lord of my life.  Because without Him, I am lost without a hope. I remember what that feels like and wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.. But I'd been slipping so bad, getting caught up in churchy things, in doing good, in behaving the right way... in pleasing everyone else before Jesus.

"... I don't want to grow if I can't reconnect with You the way I did then." When I was getting my first taste of life with Christ, I was on fire and telling everyone I could about the God that came to earth and died for us... about His crazy love! How could anyone ever become calm about Jesus and still say they KNOW Him??

"Father, I just want to see You..."  Wednesday the cry was even stronger.  At group, I shared these things that I had written in our primer book, making myself vulnerable and exposing myself ....and realized that, for whatever reason, I had stopped letting myself be vulnerable.. It was hard.  For the first time, being honest about what was really going on with me was hard.. More and more, I was realizing just how far I'd slipped.

The Lord answers prayers, that's for sure! Today (Thursday) was so breath-takingly glorious - I saw Jesus everywhere! Twice I was complimented on my smile and how it encouraged people after seeing the Lord in them, working through them, etc. had encouraged me! Blessing after blessing after opportunity to worship after opportunity to share His great love!

Tomorrow is going to be even better, I just know it. God is so good!